7 comments

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  Oracle

  3 years ago

  What?!?!
  
  A gun story and no 1911..... You should be ashamed!
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  Brian Junyor

  3 years ago

  I am going to have to agree with Oracle on this one. Your inaugural post and not even a mention of the 1911.
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  Barrett

  3 years ago

  I'm a bit miffed at my 1911 at the moment. Maybe when I'm able to actually shoot the blasted thing, I'll post about it.
  
  Excuse me while I go fondle my SP101...
  
  Mmmmm...Fixed sight goodness....
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  Mensrea

  3 years ago

  As I read along, I am not sure what the hubbub is about 1911. I mean I know a lot of important events happened in 1911, namely the 1st old folks home opened in Arizona or maybe it was the temporary appointment of General Leconte as Hatian president, who can forget the births of people such as Lucille Ball, Tennessee Williams and the death of Joseph Pulitzer; however I see no correlation to armaments, well perhaps the General had armaments.
  
  And why did you have to bring up SP101 at this time. I'm still trying to heal from the pain and suffering I had throughought second semester of my freshman year at college while attending Speech 101, damn that Bill Shoor, damn him.
  
  Now if you want to talk about real power I suggest you check out this powerhouse
  
  Death to Dust Bunnies!
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  Mensrea

  3 years ago

  And yes Junyor, that is a Hatian president, which is olde English for Haitian president.
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  Barrett

  3 years ago

  The hubbub about 1911 is that it was the year that The Prophet's design was accepted by the U.S. Army as it's primary sidearm.
  
  And now for today's scripture reading from J.M.B's holy texts:
  
  "1 In the beginning was the 1911, and the 1911 was THE pistol, and it was good. And behold the Lord said, thou shalt not muck with my disciple John's design for it is good and it workith. For John made the 1911, and lo all of his weapons, from the designs which I, the Lord, gave him upon the mountain.
  
  2 And shouldst thou muck with it, and hang all manner of foul implements upon it, and profane its internal parts, thou shalt surely have malfunctions, and in the midst of battle thou shalt surely come to harm.
  
  3 And as the ages passed men in their ignorance and arrogance didst forget the word of the Lord and began to profane the 1911. The tribe of the gamesman did place recoil spring guides and extended slide releases upon the 1911 and their metal smiths didst tighten the tolerances and alter parts to their liking, their clearness of mind being clouded by lust.
  
  4 Their artisans did hang all manner of foul implements upon the 1911 and did so alter it that it became impractical to purchase. For lo, the artisans didst charge a great tax upon the purchasers of the 1911 so that the lowly field worker could not afford one. And the profaning of the internal parts didst render it unworkable when the dust of the land fell upon it.
  
  5 And lo, they didst install adjustable sights, which are an abomination unto the Lord. For they doth break and loose their zero when thou dost need true aim. And those who have done so will be slain in great numbers by their enemies in the great battle. a
  
  6 And it came to pass that the Lord didst see the abomination wrought by man and didst cause, as he had warned, fearful malfunctions to come upon the abominations and upon the artisans who thought they could do no wrong.
  
  7 Seeing the malfunctions and the confusion of men the lord of the underworld did see an opportunity to further ensnare man and didst bring forth pistols made of plastic, whose form was such that they looked and felt like a brick, yet the eyes of man being clouded, they were consumed by the plastic pistol and did buy vast quantities of them.
  
  8 And being a deceitful spirit the lord of the underworld did make these plastic pistols unamenable to the artisans of earth and they were unable to muck much with the design, and lo these pistols did appear to function.
  
  9 And the evil one also brought forth pistols in which the trigger didst both cock and fire them and which require a "dingus" to make them appear safe.
  
  10 But man being stupid did not understand these new pistols and didst proceed to shoot themselves with the plastic pistol and with the trigger cocking pistols for lo their manual of arms required great intelligence which man had long since forsaken. Yet man continue to gloat over these new pistols blaming evil forces for the negligent discharges which they themselves had committed.
  
  11 And when man had been totally ensnared with the plastic pistol, the lord of the underworld didst cause a plague of the terrible Ka-Boom to descend upon man and the plastic pistols delivered their retribution upon men. And there was a great wailing and gnashing of teeth in the land.
  
  12 Then seeing that the eyes of man were slowly being opened and that man was truly sorrowful for his sinful misdeeds, the Lord did send his messengers in the form of artisans who did hear and obey the teachings of the prophet and who didst restore the profaned 1911s to their proper configuration, and lo, to the amazement of men they didst begin to work as the prophet had intended.
  
  13 And the men of the land didst drive out the charlatans and profaners from the land, and there was joy and peace in the land, except for the evil sprits which tried occasionally to prey on the men and women of the land and who were sent to the place of eternal damnation b by the followers of John."
  
  © copyright 2002 by John C. Schaefer
  
  :D
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  Brian Junyor

  3 years ago

  To all Senior Partners (Mens included), I hearby declare amnesty on all misspellings on the blog. WoW is different, no amnesty will be granted.
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